


A Day in the Life~ November 2019

by ERamos9696, happy29



Series: A Day in the Life [29]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:21:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 5,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22241431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ERamos9696/pseuds/ERamos9696, https://archiveofourown.org/users/happy29/pseuds/happy29
Summary: November is a challenging month for Steve and Danno. With the visit from the CIA, the mission to Mexico and the death of Doris, things get tense. Danny tries to keep things normal at home, while worrying about the mission Steve is on to bring his mother and ultimately himself, safely home. Follow us for another A Day in the Life...
Relationships: Steve McGarrett/Danny "Danno" Williams
Series: A Day in the Life [29]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/819366
Comments: 54
Kudos: 80





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sophie23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sophie23/gifts), [IUGRAD95](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IUGRAD95/gifts), [Nenuial](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nenuial/gifts), [jlc17](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jlc17/gifts), [Stacey0369](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stacey0369/gifts), [Ellejayh60](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellejayh60/gifts).



> Much Love to all of our followers. I am awestruck that we have been going as long as we have and it is because of all of you out there reading and following along and sending us good vibes to keep going!
> 
> To Liz... you know the struggle I've been through these last few months with self doubt and worry and the whole "Why the fuck did I quit my job!", But you believe in me and that helps keep me sane. I love you, I love the writing journey we have taken together and the family we have created with Steve and Danno. Thank you for being my friend, for being there for me, even though you are thousands of miles away and reminding me there is a light at the end of the self-doubt tunnel.

November 1, 2019

It was so great to see Max again with his lovely wife and his son... wow, Max has a kid! Tunde and Charlie got along so well and I am thankful there is this thing called SKYPE because my kid just made a new friend. It is too bad they weren't coming home though to stay. I miss Max and all of his quirky behaviors. I wish him and Sabrina the best though and will miss them even more.


	2. Chapter 2

November 2, 2019

Where my kid puts all of the food he consumes is beyond me. He's a bottomless pit much like Steve. Tonight was fun, playing cards with Pop, Ma, Steve, Grace, Nahele and Charlie moving from one lap to the other offer tips on what card to play next. I love family time. It is irreplaceable.


	3. Chapter 3

November 3, 2019

I used the lowball of guilt to get Grace moving this morning and realized that wasn't fair. I know that she loves her grandparents and I also realize that she is growing up and wants to spend more time with her friends than she does her family. It's just hard to accept.


	4. Chapter 4

November 4, 2019

I hate that both of my kids are miserable and I feel partially responsible for them feeling the way they do right now. Me and my big mouth, if only I would have kept my thoughts to myself, maybe this one wouldn't have happened. Maybe my bad vibes seeped through the universe somehow. I don't know. I wish I could make it all better. This isn't what I wanted for either of them. Life sucks sometimes.


	5. Chapter 5




	6. Chapter 6

November 6, 2019

Wow, I can not believe that Joe and Sarah went off and got married. It's crazy to even think that the two of them work as a couple because of their age difference, but it isn't even an issue. Hell, she's younger than Steve and I which makes calling her our mother-in-law a little on the weird side. But what the hell, at least this one likes me and I like her and she hasn't once tried to make our lives miserable. Unless you count those breathing treatments she made me do when I was recovering from being shot. I'm really happy for her and Joe, they deserve to be happy and it makes our family unit that much stronger to have her a part of our lives. Wow, what a surprise.


	7. Chapter 7




	8. Chapter 8




	9. Chapter 9

November 9, 2019

I love the family feels I get from the weekends. Therapy is sometimes rough, but it helps us through tough issues. Whether or not Steve ever takes me to Rhode Island, it doesn't matter, as long as we are together. It's nice to see that Grace and Will have remained friends through their breakup because they are both amazing kids and I only want them both to be happy. 

I'm still waiting for Steve to come upstairs and crawl into bed with me. Sometimes that's all I need, is just to have him close. I enjoy just laying in bed, legs flung over each other, nose to nose and just talking until we fall asleep. I love that man more everyday. He makes my heart race when he smiles that smile reserved just for me. He makes things inside of me come alive when he touches me just so...

He better hurry up...


	10. Chapter 10

November 10, 2019

Oh my God, what the hell has Doris gotten herself into this time? I know she is Steve's mother but my God, hasn't she already caused enough grief in his life? It scares me, especially knowing that Joe is involved, that it isn't going to be a walk in the park. Nothing with her ever is. Nothing in Steve's life involving his mother has ever been easy. To learn that your mother has died and your father sends you off to military school, only to have your father killed and learn years later that she was alive and well. God how fucked up. I doubt either of us will get any real solid sleep. How can we?

Something just feels different this time around and that scares the hell out of me.


	11. Chapter 11

November 11, 2019

I don't even know where to start today...This one scares me more than any other mission Steve has ever gone on. There is nothing that calms my nerves, not really even having Joe there when he meets up with him. This is Doris and every situation is beyond fucked up with her. Always. My gut tells me that Steve isn't going to come out of this unscathed. And I understand, but I'm beyond pissed that he wouldn't let me go with him. I know he was given strict orders to do this alone... I hate the CIA.


	12. Chapter 12

November 12, 2019

I don't know how I am going to keep it all together with Steve gone. I don't know how I'm going to crawl out of bed everyday until he comes back. God, this is tough. It's horrible being separated. It's so difficult keeping our communication just between the two of us and not letting the team know how things are for him. I stayed back in the office today and let the team handle any calls that came in. I know I can't do that everyday or they will know that something is up. They are smart people our team.

God... this is only day one.


	13. Chapter 13




	14. Chapter 14

November 14, 2019

Oh my God. I'm in shock. Doris is dead. Steve's mom is really dead. This wasn't how it was supposed to end. She wasn't supposed to die, not on his watch. She was supposed to come home with him and they would have words and argue and then she would be on her way again. That's what was _supposed_ to happen. That's what _always_ happens. God... I don't even know how to comfort Steve. I just want to hold him and tell him that everything will be okay. But will it? He sounded lost and broken and so far away.

I have no words...


	15. Chapter 15

Danny walked briskly down the hotel hall towards Steve’s room. He couldn’t wait to hold his husband in his arms and at least offer the comfort of being together. He knew this wasn’t going to be an easy road. Doris’s death had affected Steve much deeper than that of his father which Danny found oddly ironic. Doris was a horrible mother who walked out on her family one too many times for the service of her country. And for what? All she left in her wake was pain, hurt and abandonment.  
Danny paused in front of Steve’s door, still pissed at the snarky desk clerk who refused to give him a key to his husband’s room. It felt odd knocking on the door of a hotel room occupied by your spouse. Danny raised his hand and gave the door several rasps of his knuckles. He took a deep breath and tried to steady his nerves, not really knowing what to expect of Steve when he opened the door. He had been told by Junior that Steve had been injured but that it was superficial and he would be fine within a few weeks time. He tried to get some information from Joe about Steve’s mental state but all of his calls continued to go to voicemail. He finally got a text message telling him to be patient with Steve and that he was going to need some time to process everything that has happened concerning Doris.

  
After what seemed like an eternity to Danny, but was really only about fifteen seconds, the door swung open and Danny came face to face with his battered partner. He forced a smile he wasn’t feeling, shocked at Steve’s appearance. “Hiya!” was the dumbest thing that came out of his mouth.

  
“What are you doing here?” Steve asked not entirely shocked to see his husband standing on the other side of the door.

  
Danny was pretty sure his eyes had bugged out at the ridiculous question. Steve did in fact call him and tell him he needed him, did he not? “Just making sure you come back to Hawaii.” Danny wasn’t sure what part of the brain his mouth was retrieving its words from but once again he felt dumb and disconnected.

  
“Of course you did. Come in.” Steve took an unsteady step backwards and allowed Danny entrance into the room.  
Danny suddenly felt like a stranger to the man before him. The man who knew him inside and out, the man he loved with every ounce of his being. He wanted to wrap his arms around him, pull him close and kiss him, offering comforting words as he held him and promised everything would be okay. Instead he kept some space between them, unsure what was going on in the back of Steve’s mind concerning him. This was not the welcome he was expecting when Steve said he needed him the last time they spoke. He scanned the room, noticed the empty beer bottles, the discarded letter on the table and put two and two together. Steve had put up a wall, not just a wall but a fucking barricade protecting himself from anyone close to him that could hurt him again. Danny’s heart crumbled at the broken man before him. Steve had endured so much over the past ten years and he wondered if this was the straw that would finally do him in.

  
Danny dropped his bag to the floor and picked up the letter off the table and read it aloud. ‘‘What a punch to the gut,’ he thought to himself. ‘How much more can Steve take?’  
“I’m really sorry about your mom,” he offered his condolences as he sat in the chair opposite his husband. “This isn’t the ending you deserved. Nobody deserves to lose their mom as many times as you have.” 

  
Steve bristled at the mention of his mother’s name and all that he had lost, again. Danny began to question whether the love he had for Steve was enough to bring him back from the rapidly degrading ledge Steve had himself perched upon. Danny wanted to run his fingers gently over Steve’s various cuts and bruises, to gauge for himself the condition his partner was in, but he felt like a stranger. As much as he loved Steve, he didn’t dare make the first move. Or did he? Danny was at a loss how to help.   
He was exhausted from not sleeping the past week, from the long flight at the butt crack of before dawn and he knew Steve was worse off than him. He wondered how they kept themselves going. As tired as he was, he knew that sleep would elude them until he would be able to crack Steve’s shell and pull his Steve free from all the hurt.

  
Danny told him about the account that Doris had set up for Joanie and he listened as his husband let go of what was on his mind. Danny really didn’t want to interrupt any of it.

  
“Have you eaten?” Danny asked. He pointed a finger in Steve’s direction. “Beer does not count as food either, Steven.”

  
“Yes.” Steve paused over the answer. “ I think so.” He gave it another second. “I’m not sure, but I am not hungry.” He handed his husband another beer.

  
“Well, I am. Starving actually. I think I missed all three meals today and between the inflight choice and the mouth breather hogging my personal space, I didn’t want to eat. If I order something, you gonna at least eat a bite?” He looked around for the usual local menus by the phone. Danny glanced through the pamphlets in his hands. “Hey, you think that bed’s big enough for the both of us? It’s only a double and I can manage to hog a king.”  
Steve put his beer down and walked over to the bathroom. “You’re sleeping on the couch.” He closed the door.

  
Danny sat in his chair trying to shake the shock at his husband’s response. “I’m not sleeping on the couch,” he hollered loud enough for Steve to hear. “I didn’t fly ten hours in a tin can to sleep on the couch,” he muttered under his breath. “What the fuck?” Danny pulled out his cell and started to order a pizza while Steve did whatever it was he was doing in the bathroom to avoid Danny.

  
“I’m supposed to be upset with you for letting Junior and his crew come help in Mexico.” Steve exited the bathroom, his kidneys thankful for being relieved.

  
“I honestly thought we were going to skip that stage, but whatever.” Danny disconnected the call.” Be upset with me. I’m still not sleeping on the couch. Even if I do fit.”

  
Steve used his good hand to help his husband up on his feet. “How about we go to dinner? The restaurant downstairs is nice. We’ll probably be surrounded by spies. You can make it up to me by buying me dinner.” Steve wasn’t letting go of Danny’s hand.

  
Danny squeezed Steve’s hand and moved closer so their chests were touching. “I needed to make sure you were okay. That’s why I sent Junior and his SEAL buddies.”

  
“I know. You did the right thing. You always do. I know.” Steve led Danny to the door and opened it for his husband. “I think I am hungry.”

  
Danny let go of the tension he was feeling and gave Steve a genuine smile. He rolled up on the balls of his feet and carefully planted a soft kiss to Steve’s bruised lips. “There’s the guy I know and love. After dinner, I’m going to take care of that beard, if you will let me. I want my Steve back.”

  
“Okay.”

  
Both men took a booth at the back of the restaurant. The hostess was quick to realize that they were a couple and looked like they needed to be alone. She handed them both their menus, did the hostess thing and Steve ordered them both another beer. Danny had chimed in that they would both start with water as well. Having Danny in his side was bringing him back to the present, back to a life worth living. He had been in such a dark place less than an hour ago, staring out the window at the Capitol Building. He thought of all that he had given up. But then he thought of the one thing he had that could not be taken away from him. Danny had been mostly quiet through dinner and he knew that was a lot for him. But for now, having Danny next to him, that spoke volumes. 

  
After dinner they decided to take a stroll around the hotel mall. Danny said it was to let their food settle but he really had another goal. Soon they came up on the shop that he was hoping to find and sat Steve down on the bench and told him he would be right back. Steve watched Danny’s every move. He was pointing left and right and the customer service girl was scrambling to get him everything he was asking for. Soon he was at the cash register making his purchase and then walking back to his husband. Steve drifted off for just a second.

“Hey, you with me?” Danny spoke softly so he didn’t startle Steve and offered his hand to his husband. 

  
Steve recognized Danny’s voice immediately and practically jumped to his feet, happy to take Danny’s hand again.

  
“Always,” Steve gave him a small smile as they slipped their fingers together and walked away from the store. “What did you pick up?”

  
Danny turned to his husband and ran a finger down the side of his face, stopping at the beard that desperately needed to go or be groomed. “Something to help make you look like you again.”

  
Steve rubbed at his scruff covered chin. He hadn’t shaved for several days before his trip to Columbia and he hadn’t shaved since. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t think he had even looked at his reflection in a mirror, either. He rubbed his chin again and felt like he was inhabiting someone else’s body. Danny had a point but he didn’t think he was up to the task of shaving with only one good arm. 

  
Danny seemed to sense his apprehension and slowed to a stop, turning to face Steve. “I got this, Babe. I’ve got you. All you have to do is sit there and not move.” Danny caressed Steve’s cheek, mindful of the bruises.

  
A tear formed in the corner of Steve’s eye and threatened to fall. Danny whisked it away with a gentle swipe of his thumb. Steve brought his good arm up and captured Danny’s hand against his cheek. He turned his head and kissed the palm of Danny’s hand. “Thank you.”

  
Danny ran his thumb over Steve’s cheek once more. “Anytime, Babe.” He threw a thumb over his shoulder. “One more stop and we can go back to the room.”

  
Steve raised his eyebrows curious as he took Danny’s hand once again. “What’s the next place?”

  
Danny inhaled the aroma around him. “Coffee. I could use a triple.”

  
Steve gave him a crooked smile as they approached the counter and Danny ordered them each a coffee. “I think you may have an addiction there, Detective.”

  
Danny just grinned. The playful banter between them was comforting but Danny knew it probably wouldn’t last long. He would take what he could get for the time being.

  
The Barista handed Danny their coffees and he passed one off to Steve. He took a sip and sighed with content. This was much better than the beer he drank earlier and the caffeine was much needed in his system to function or he was going to pass out from exhaustion and he knew Steve was in the same boat. “Come on, let’s head back.” Danny slipped an arm around Steve’s waist and led him toward the lobby and the elevator.

  
The bell dinged and Danny ushered Steve out of the elevator onto their floor and in the direction of their room. He took the keycard out of his pocket and unlocked the door, pushing it open and guiding Steve inside. At the moment, his husband wasn’t in any condition to do anything but be led around. He wasn’t sure that Steve knew up from down at the moment. He shrugged out of his jacket and helped Steve out of his, depositing them both in a nearby chair.  
He pointed towards the bathroom. “Let’s take care of that lumberjack beard.”

  
Steve rubbed at his chin. “You don’t like it?”

  
Danny huffed. “That would be a strong no. I mean, you can keep it if you never want me to kiss you again.”

  
“Never? You would seriously never kiss me again?”

  
Danny shook his head. “No, that’s a bold face lie. I will always kiss you. But it reminds me of the times that weren’t so good and I don’t want to be reminded of those times every time I look at you and I don’t want you to be reminded of those times every time you look in the mirror either.”

  
Steve nodded and looked away, his eyes tearing up.

  
“Babe,” Danny rubbed Steve’s cheek. “If you want to keep it, I’ll just trim it up.”

  
“No. I don’t want to be reminded of any of this.”

  
Danny rolled up on the balls of his feet and kissed Steve lightly on the lips. “I love you, scruffy beard and all. But I want my Steve back.”

  
“I want to be back. But I feel so lost, Danny.”

  
“One day at a time, Babe. There is no rush.”

  
“Okay.” Steve took a step towards the bathroom. “I can do one day at a time.”

  
Danny grabbed the shaving supplies and followed Steve into the bathroom. The first days were always the hardest to get through and he hoped the shave would help Steve feel more grounded, more himself.


	16. Chapter 16

November 16, 2019

I am so thankful to have Steve home. He may not be whole, but we will get there. One day at a time...


	17. Chapter 17




	18. Chapter 18

_This is the phone call between Danny and Steve when Steve is in the truck, after Quinn gets out and joins the rest of the team at Kamekona's shrimp truck. The "I miss her, Danny" is not Doris..._

“I miss her, Danny.” 

“I know you do. I’m going to as well. Mornings are going to be weird for a while. She loves you, she really does, but she needs…” Danny paused trying to pick the right words without upsetting Steve further. When Grace text Steve earlier instead of meeting them at Gail’s, Danny knew it wasn’t going to be good. “She needs some time to think. SHe was worried you weren’t going to come home.”

“That’s what you say. That’s what Gail said. But did Gracie tell you anything else today? You were with her all day. Okay. Can’t you tell her to come home?”

“I could, but you know that won’t make things magically better. She kinda reminds me of you right now. Putting up walls, afraid that those closest to us are going to hurt us. She’s putting on this ploy that if I don’t let him get any closer, it will hurt less if anything happens to him. She’ll come home when she’s ready.”

“What if she runs away like I did. I could have come home after military school. I was so mad at John, my dad, for so long. What if she never wants to come home again?”

“Babe, this is nothing like that. Nobody is sending anyone away, nobody has faked their death.”

“That’s not fair.”

“What I’m trying to get you to understand is you are nothing like your parents. You don’t parent like your parents and Gracie going to spend some time with her mom is okay. She doesn’t love you any less than she did two weeks ago. She’s scared. Our lives are crazy and she’s scared of the outcome of that craziness. She will come home, I promise you.”

Steve held the phone to his temple trying to process everything that his husband was saying. He finally spurt out, “It hurts so much.”

“I know it does. And it will until she comes back, but we have to let her make that choice. You’ve suffered a huge loss with your mom and I don’t have all the right words to make that bearable. I don’t know what it feels like to lose your parents, the people who brought you into this world. I don’t know what it feels like to have them turn their backs on you, to push you away in order to protect you from the mess they’ve made for themselves. But what I do know is that Gracie loves you, I love you, Nahele loves you, Charlie loves you, your sister, niece, your in-laws, Joe and Sarah. You are not alone in your hurt. We hurt with you, Steve.”

“I’m sorry, Danny. I know. I just want to hug her and tell her that. Knowing that I was coming home to you and the kids is what kept me going. Okay? I thought when I got home everything would be great again. I need my whole family, Danny. I need her to know I love her so much.”

“Please stop apologizing. You are allowed to grieve. You are allowed to hurt. Your family is whole, alright? Gracie will come over for dinners, she will come swim with you in the mornings when your arm heals. You want to hug her, go hug her. She isn’t going to turn you away.”

“Are you sure?”

“I am. Babe, remember our daughter is a teenager. She is in the middle of that whole sending mixed signals stage of life. She acts like she wants space by going back to her moms. But deep down, she wants to hug you and never let go.”

Steve heard every word. He knew if Danny was saying it, it was true. He glanced up to see his Ohana sitting at the table, laughing, smiling. He didn’t want to bring down the mood. “Hey, Babe, I am going to go back to the Palace and finish some paperwork. Today was a good day for us. Not good for some bad guys. I will call you when I am done. I am sorry for not picking up your calls earlier. I think I was afraid that you were going to tell me something I was too afraid to hear from Gracie. I’m sorry. Okay?”

“It’s okay. I figured as much. You know, mister, you weren’t even supposed to go into work today. I’ll be upset with you about disregarding orders for resting later. I love you, you know that right? We will get through this together. And when we do, our family will be stronger because of it. Gracie didn’t put up a fight to get your last name added to hers for nothing. She loves you very much. You are her dad and she needs you as much as you need her.”

“Thank you.”

“Please don’t be too late. You’re not even supposed to be at work.”

“Okay. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

  
  
  
  



	19. Chapter 19




	20. Chapter 20

The hostess asks how many and Steve says five without missing a beat. Danny sadly corrects him and tells her four. Steve has to think for a moment and then remembers he is a child short. They get to the table and Steve looks for her because he always lets her pick her seat and scoots it in for her. But she’s not there. The nice waiter goes over the specials and Steve hears the sushi dish Gracie enjoys most but when he looks over to see her excitement, she is missing from his left; his right. Danny reaches over to put his hand over his husband’s as if to say, he did the same and knows he misses her.

Steve orders for everyone. Danny makes the comment that that’s a lot of food for four but Steve’s defense is that Nahele will make sure the plates will be empty before they leave.

“Hi Daddy. Hi Danno.” Both men are on their feet before she can say her brothers’ names. “My practice was cancelled. I hope it’s okay that I surprised you.” 

Steve wants to give her his chair but Nahele is up and already asking the waiter for another setting and chair to be brought to the table.

Gracie looks beautiful in her pencil skirt and glittered blouse. Steve notices right away that she is wearing the glittered high tops he bought her this past August.

Soon she is sitting, between her dads and Charlie starts to tell her about the sushi Steve ordered. 

“Gracie, I can order your favorite as soon he comes back.”

“Thank you Daddy.”

Steve needs those words like air to breathe.

Steve looks over to Nahele and sees the biggest smile on his face, looking down and pretending to look at his shoe.

And Steve knows. He knows Nahele had something to do with this. But he doesn't want to say anything out loud because it might change the mood at the table or bring news that Steve won't want to hear.

Charlie gets out of his chair and walks over to Danno. "Danno, can we see the fish?" Charlie is a fan of the huge aquarium tank in the center of the restaurant.

"Can Nahele take you, Buddy?" Gracie looks over to her older brother for support. Nahele is up and swinging Charlie into his arms. "Let's go see the fish."

Now it's the three sitting there and Steve wants to say the right thing. He wants to hear that his daughter is coming home. That she misses him as much as he misses her. Danny looks over to Steve to say anything, but instead Steve gives him the look for Danny to say something instead.

"How was school today Gracie?"

"School is school. I can't believe Stan pays that much money for classes that I practically have to teach myself the curriculum."

Both men have heard her complain about most of her teachers.

It's Steve's turn to say something and he's over thinking what to say. "Have you talked to Stan?"

"Today as a matter of fact."

She has her fathers' attention.

"He wanted to know what my Thanksgiving plans were."

And here it comes. Gracie is about to tell both of them that she will be spending Thanksgiving in Las Vegas.

"He's building a new conference hall in New Orleans. Have you heard about that?"

It's worse than Steve thought. She will be in New Orleans. Then he realized that Charlie might go with her too. He can understand Stan missing them both. His heart is sinking and he swears he can take his pulse through his own fingertips. Then he wonders if Nahele will be joining him. After all, Nahele has never been to New Orleans and Gracie is sure to invite him.

"New Orleans? No, I hadn't heard. Did he move from Vegas?"

Steve can hear that Danny is nervous and is probably having the same thoughts as he is.

"No way. He's never giving up that penthouse." Gracie thanks the waiter for the waters he has brought to the table. "So, I told him,"

Steve knows this is it. He's not going to be able to eat. He's not even sure if he's not going to be able not to cry.

"- that he should come and have Thanksgiving with us. I mean, I know the two of you are always okay with it, but I thought I should make sure that he knows that he is always invited."

Steve heart is beating so loud that he thinks he misunderstood what Gracie just said. He looks over to Danno and Danno is smiling the smile that Steve always wants to greet with a kiss. "Of course he is," Danny reaffirms her words, "he always is.

They both look over to Steve to get some reaction. Steve nods. "Baby Girl, when are you coming home?" There. Steve has asked and he can't undo the question that needed to be asked. "I miss you Gracie. I miss you so much. We all do."

Danny just nods and Gracie takes a moment to smile at them both. "Daddy, Danno, if it's okay with both of you, I would just like to stay with my mom until Sunday. It's been nice talking to her, and, well, she knows how I feel."

Both men want to say something, but if anything, Gail has taught them how to listen.

Gracie continues, "Danno, Dad, this has been hard on me too. I wasn't running away. I just needed to get my thoughts straight. And I am. I've been talking to my mom, Gail, Papa Joe and Sarah, Grandma and Grandpa, and Auntie Mary, Nahele-"

Steve is beginning to feel slided that they are not in the mix. "- and I want to be the best daughter I can be, but I need to learn how to deal. And I am. I want to come home tonight, but Mom has been very patient with me, and well, she has been super helpful, and I told her that I was going home Sunday, and she was alright with that. I hope that's okay."

Steve looks over to Danny, and wants to make sure that they are both on the same page. Danny is nodding and confirms everything Gracie has said.

"Danno," Nahele is before them at the table, “Charlie tried to jump in the tank. Haven't we talked about this before?"

"I just wanted to touch one." Charlie protests.

Danno puts their son on his knee. "We can't come here anymore.."

Gracie is looking at Steve. "I miss you too, Daddy. I love you."

Steve puts his arms around her shoulders and kisses her on top of her head. "You take your time Baby Girl. You take your time."

The waiters are there now with plate after plate of food. "Your father swears that Nahele can eat this on his own." Danny lets Charlie go back to his chair.

"Not if I eat it all first." Gracie and Nahele reach for the same roll.

Danny slaps both their hands away. "Manners!" And before they can both pout, Danny pops the roll into his mouth. Both kids laugh and Steve knows the world is right again.


	21. Chapter 21




	22. Chapter 22




	23. Chapter 23

November 23, 2019

Today was rough. Burying their mother for the second time in Steve and Mary's lives isn't something they should have to do twice in a lifetime. I know that deep down they are both hurting, for the life lost, the mother they remember lost for good. Final closure I suppose someone could say, but I know that is a load of crap. Burying someone is never final closure, it is just the end of a chapter and the beginning of a new one. Now comes the healing. I'm so proud of my children. Funerals are rough to get through, the emotions that ones feel vary from one person to the next and confusing as hell for little ones. "Why won't she just wake up?" and "Are they really going to put her in the ground. How will she get out?" Kids don't always understand the finality of death. I'm glad Steve didn't hear all of Charlie's conversation with Nahele because bless his young heart, it hasn't fully hit him what this means to Steve.

Today was rough. But we made it through the best we can. The love we have for Steve is endless and we are all here for him, when this all really hits home.


	24. Chapter 24

November 24, 2019,

Today feels normal, almost too normal and I worry about Steve.


	25. Chapter 25

November 25, 2019

One would think I would be used to things blowing up around me by now after nine years of being on this task force, but that is a big NOPE! God my head is killing me and yes, probably should have taken a detour to get my head checked at the ER. Sometimes Steve is right in the most annoying ways.


	26. Chapter 26

November 26, 2019

So strange not to be fixing Thanksgiving dinner this year. Steve insisted on having Flippa's mom put together a meal so we could enjoy the day with no worries. But he forgets that I love fixing big meals. It's all good though. I will try to enjoy the day.


	27. Chapter 27




	28. Chapter 28




	29. Chapter 29




	30. Chapter 30




End file.
